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Xmas tree *******s

thfcsteff

thfcsteff

Terry Dyson
Am I just a grumpy middle-aged **** (don't answer that truthfully)...?

Just struggled up the stairs with the annual ****ing pine tree, poor ******* chopped down for two weeks because...well, the youngest I suppose...I would've been happy with a three foot tinsel thing and some fairy lights, but no, we had to have a 6ft pine tree shedding needles everywhere, awkward to get through the ****ing doors, forcing a perfectly excellent indoor plant to be shunted off to the downstairs because of space issues in the living room and now we get to be grumpy as we all try to wrap the ****ing thing in lights and hang absurdly ugly baubles off it.

I look forward to holographic trees which don't require a lumberjack, don't require haulage, don't require shedding all over the place and can be turned on and off with the click of a button!!!!!!!

Better stil...just put the lights on the ****ing plant we had there!!!!! A lovely plant it is, large, leafy, tall, why not?

Arrrrgggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!
 
We have fake ones but they look quite classy(at the price they bloody well should) I like the white one the best that has lights at the end of the branches and changes colour.

I am impressed steff that you go and chop one down.
 
japenesegardenlover said:
We have fake ones but they look quite classy(at the price they bloody well should) I like the white one the best that has lights at the end of the branches and changes colour.

I am impressed steff that you go and chop one down.
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Not even that cool Chich, no, I go and buy it from the same place every year. Good organization, it's a place where ex-cons rehab their way out and back into civvy life, sort of like halfway house employment.but no mate, no lumberjack action sadly. ****, that's even sadder isn't it?! I'm off to comfort myself with some ****.
 
I know that Christmas has begun when I carry the tree back from wherever I buy it. Nothing says Christmas to me like clunking an unobservant teenager in the face with the trunk of a blue spruce.
 
I Will be heading up the woods this Sunday with chainsaw in hand, Its a ritual i very much look forward to. After i have been a man and hacked the biggest tree i could possible dream of fitting in the living room i get a right royal *******ing from the misses for going over the top "again" and then spend the next hour trimming it to her standard making me feel a lot less like a man.

Then i get drunk and make ****ty comments from the sofa while the "boss" and kids desecrate the ****ing thing. At which point the cats and dog will slowly start to destroy it.

****ers
 
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Notmegov said:
I Will be heading up the woods this Sunday with chainsaw in hand, Its a ritual i very much look forward to. After i have been a man and hacked the biggest tree i could possible dream of fitting in the living room i get a right royal *******ing for the misses for going over the top "again" and then spend the next hour trimming it to her slandered making me feel a lot less like a man.

Then i get drunk and make ****ty comments from the sofa while the "boss" and kids desecrate the ****ing thing. At which point the cats and dog will slowly start to destroy it.

****ers
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You, Sir, have found a way to enjoy it all...well done!
 
Notmegov said:
I Will be heading up the woods this Sunday with chainsaw in hand, Its a ritual i very much look forward to. After i have been a man and hacked the biggest tree i could possible dream of fitting in the living room i get a right royal *******ing for the misses for going over the top "again" and then spend the next hour trimming it to her slandered making me feel a lot less like a man.

Then i get drunk and make ****ty comments from the sofa while the "boss" and kids desecrate the ****ing thing. At which point the cats and dog will slowly start to destroy it.

****ers
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Merry Christmas, you have won the internets.
 
Holographic Christmas tree, oh sign me up for that!!![emoji319][emoji319][emoji319][emoji319][emoji319]


Sitting on my porcelain throne using Fapatalk
 
Jordinho said:
I've only got a living room, but it's ****ing huge. And no :wife: preventing me from having the biggest tv and speakers I could find.
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I've got a bigger dingdong than you!!

Actually, I probably haven't but just joining in!

And yes Steff you sound like Scrooge :)
 
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