desperategirl
Phil Gray
Hi dear Spurs fans,
I registered just to post this as my bf is on this site ALL the time which I think has come to a point that our relationship is affected. I feel so helpless and would like to get your advice on this one.
So I've been with this guy for about a year and a half. From a very early stage I was informed that he is a big Spurs fan. I don't watch football on a regular basis but I didn't really consider it any problem at all initially. In fact the second time we ever met he was constantly checking his phone claiming "sorry my team is playing tonight" which I thought was the football team he played for in his spare time that sort of thing, and because we were on a date so he couldn't make it there and was getting updates from his team mates ('How sweet' I thought!). I didn't realise he was so obsessed by the site as before that date we met once after chatting for some time online first-just to give you some background information I caught him lying about his age after the first date so he really tried to convince me to come out again. How important would the updates on a site be when you eventually convinced someone to see you again and had this person sitting in front of you? I really don't get it.
And with time passing by it's getting more and more obvious how addicted he is to this site. I don't really think he posts ever, but he is constantly constantly checking the site from his phone and computer, I'd say at least 20 times a day. You know when you read the post and scroll down there's a greyish blue bar on top of each reply? Whenever I have a peek on his phone it's always those bars moving down or up. I tried to talk to him about it and see when he started his obsession, turned out that it was only from a few years ago when he was kind of low in life (losing job, friends, etc). I mean as I said liking a sport and a fan site is not a problem for me especially it offers comfort to one's life, but to what extend? On a normal Saturday morning (like this morning) as soon as he got up he'd first browse this site on his phone in bed, then he'd go to the living room and turn on his computer for some more browsing during which he was completely in his own world. No matter what you said to him he's not listening or responding, he has to browse till his heart is content (or I'd assume till all new posts/replies from the previous night are covered!)
before he carries on with his day.
I really don't know what to do. When he's not on this site he's just a normal bf but say if we go grocery shopping later he could slowly follow me the entire way with his eyes sticking on his phone's screen with no response to whatever I say. Or sometimes when I deliberately walk into the room naked if he's not on this site he'd instantly jump up (and on) but when he is he'd give me a quick glance from the top edge of his laptop, look back down, and say to me with his eyes still scanning this site: "Woman, could you put some cloth on please?" UGH!! I'm just SO frustrated! Can anyone give some opinion/advice on this? Is it some sort of compulsory obsession? Is it because he's gay-ish and loves one of the players?
Thank you so much for reading my post and apologise for rambling. Some advice would be very much appreciated! Thanks in advance.
Ps. We don't have Sky at home and he rarely goes to watch the game in person so it's not like he's splashing money on Spurs, but this obsession and the amount of time he spends on the site really worries me.
Pps. Heard about the game this evening. Good luck Spurs
I registered just to post this as my bf is on this site ALL the time which I think has come to a point that our relationship is affected. I feel so helpless and would like to get your advice on this one.
So I've been with this guy for about a year and a half. From a very early stage I was informed that he is a big Spurs fan. I don't watch football on a regular basis but I didn't really consider it any problem at all initially. In fact the second time we ever met he was constantly checking his phone claiming "sorry my team is playing tonight" which I thought was the football team he played for in his spare time that sort of thing, and because we were on a date so he couldn't make it there and was getting updates from his team mates ('How sweet' I thought!). I didn't realise he was so obsessed by the site as before that date we met once after chatting for some time online first-just to give you some background information I caught him lying about his age after the first date so he really tried to convince me to come out again. How important would the updates on a site be when you eventually convinced someone to see you again and had this person sitting in front of you? I really don't get it.
And with time passing by it's getting more and more obvious how addicted he is to this site. I don't really think he posts ever, but he is constantly constantly checking the site from his phone and computer, I'd say at least 20 times a day. You know when you read the post and scroll down there's a greyish blue bar on top of each reply? Whenever I have a peek on his phone it's always those bars moving down or up. I tried to talk to him about it and see when he started his obsession, turned out that it was only from a few years ago when he was kind of low in life (losing job, friends, etc). I mean as I said liking a sport and a fan site is not a problem for me especially it offers comfort to one's life, but to what extend? On a normal Saturday morning (like this morning) as soon as he got up he'd first browse this site on his phone in bed, then he'd go to the living room and turn on his computer for some more browsing during which he was completely in his own world. No matter what you said to him he's not listening or responding, he has to browse till his heart is content (or I'd assume till all new posts/replies from the previous night are covered!)
before he carries on with his day.
I really don't know what to do. When he's not on this site he's just a normal bf but say if we go grocery shopping later he could slowly follow me the entire way with his eyes sticking on his phone's screen with no response to whatever I say. Or sometimes when I deliberately walk into the room naked if he's not on this site he'd instantly jump up (and on) but when he is he'd give me a quick glance from the top edge of his laptop, look back down, and say to me with his eyes still scanning this site: "Woman, could you put some cloth on please?" UGH!! I'm just SO frustrated! Can anyone give some opinion/advice on this? Is it some sort of compulsory obsession? Is it because he's gay-ish and loves one of the players?
Thank you so much for reading my post and apologise for rambling. Some advice would be very much appreciated! Thanks in advance.
Ps. We don't have Sky at home and he rarely goes to watch the game in person so it's not like he's splashing money on Spurs, but this obsession and the amount of time he spends on the site really worries me.
Pps. Heard about the game this evening. Good luck Spurs
