The funniest football chants

[Daisuk]

So I'm sitting here looking up artworks by schizofrenic people and come across a site "famous schizofrenics", where former Rangers and Man U goalkeeper Andy Goram was listed. The article on Wikipedia says;

After it was reported in the press that Goram had a mild form of schizophrenia, fans responded with a chorus of "Two Andy Gorams, there's only two Andy Gorams".

:lol:

Although schizofrenia is a very serious disorder, one I wouldn't wish upon my worst enemy - that chant is hilarious.

What are some of your favorite humorous football chants?

 

[thfcsteff]

I have to say 'his eyes are offside' is an absolute belter!
You'll never get a job...
In the 70s the old 'Who's up Mary Brown, who's up Mary Brown, Tommy Tommy Docherty Tommy Tommy Docherty' always made me laugh, as did 'Peter Shilton Peter Shilton, does your wife know that you're here?!!!'
To my shame (!!!) I found 'packet of sweets' incredibly funny, ditto 'Amarillo...'...
But maybe the greatest ever?
Oh Ledley Ledley, he's only got one knee, he's better than John Terry, oh Ledley Ledley...praise for ours, a straight fact-based slam for that c nut and got better to sing the more pints you had/have...

 

[bennysleftfoot]

"his teeth are offside" at Suarez always gets a giggle from me

 

[thfcsteff]

"his teeth are offside" at Suarez always gets a giggle from me

:lol:

 

[Lemonade Money]

Van. Per. Sie. When a girl says no - molest her

 

[milo]

If you tolerate Rix, then your children will be next

 

[Stufat]

When your sat in row z and the ball hits your head, that's zamora

 

[scaramanga]

If you tolerate Rix, then your children will be next

One of my favourites.

I know it's not original, but I really love The Norwich Family (or any other club not from the South East when we're a little ****ed).

 

[Baleforce]

best one lately for me is the jonjo shelvey voldemort chant

 

[nelto]

The Chelsea match in 2010 - Terry sent off: "He's off the pitch, he's shagging your wife!"
Everton away, this year, to Baines - "You're just a sh1t Bradley Wiggins"

 

[AuroRaman]

Think it was Middlesborough to Saudi Sportswashing Machine fans and their retaliation a few years back, when both teams were facing relegation:

Boro fans: Going down, going down, going down!

Saudi Sportswashing Machine fans: So are we, so are we, so are we!

 

[AuroRaman]

Park, Park, Where ever you may be
You eat dogs in your home country
But it could be worse
You could be a scouse
Eating rats in your council house

 

[Daisuk]

I also had a laugh when I saw the original song for the Eriksen-Sen-Sen chant. Ridiculous. :lol:

[video=youtube;POv-3yIPSWc]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=POv-3yIPSWc[/video]

[video=youtube;wqoJ4LzK-PE]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wqoJ4LzK-PE[/video]

 

[Disco Benny]

'Fat Eddie Murphy, you're just a fat Eddie Murphy' - to Jimmy Floyd Hasslebank whilst warming up for Boro, he even smiled.

The wheels on your house go round and round - always makes me chuckle (I know I should be better than that, but I'm not)

We're ****, and we're beating you - think that was West Brom a few years ago

 

[Lemonade Money]

I also had a laugh when I saw the original song for the Eriksen-Sen-Sen chant. Ridiculous. :lol:

If you think that is ridiculous, try this:
[video=youtube;LXtx6N3ww7Y]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LXtx6N3ww7Y[/video]

 

[paxtonwolf]

My recent favourite was after Peter Odemwningie turned up at QPR in his car on transfer deadline day. We were at WBA a few days later.
'He drives where he wants, he drives where he wants, Od-em-wingie, he drives where he wants'

Even got a clap off the home the fans. Moments later their centre=forward missed a good chance and it was
'He would have scored that, he would have scored that, Od-em-wingie, he would have scored that'

 

[Aldo]

[video=youtube;bbfy05y5Ukw]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bbfy05y5Ukw[/video]

 

[Mumorn]

"You should have stayed on the telly" - towards Alan Shearer when he took over Saudi Sportswashing Machine.
"Sit down Mrs Doubtfire" - sung by us towards Steve Bruce.

 

[stinkfoot]

:lol:

[video=youtube;FZnYloe5rhw]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FZnYloe5rhw[/video]

 

[Craig_J]

Brighton fans for Zamora:
"When the ball hits the goal it's not Shearer or Cole it's Zamora
When the ball hits the net and the women get wet it's Zamora"

Us for Zamora:

"When the ball hits your head and your sat in row Z it's Zamora"


After Spurs beat Bristol Rovers 9-0 in the 70's Bristol City fans sung:
1-2-3-4-5-6-7-8-9 TOTTENAHM

Usually I'd be able to think more but feel brain dead at the moment!