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ETP's Tottenham Crimbo Song Thread

Enter the Pitbull

Enter the Pitbull

Luke Young
The Twelve Days of Christmas by Enter the Pitbull

On the 12th day of Christmas Dan Levy sent to me
Twelve seasons transitioning
Eleven Townsends shooting
Ten Ades laughing
Nine Hugos flapping
Eight Redknapps twitching
Seven deadline signings
Six Bennys LOL-ing
FIVE WALKER GAFFES
Four stadium delays
Three high lines
Two red sponsors
AND A TAXI FOR ANDRE VILLY B
 
(To the tune of Let it Snow)

Oh the press were just oh so spiteful
Coz the high-line was oh so frightful
Xavi Henderson stole the show
Benny LOL'd Benny LOL'd Benny LOL'd

Andre stood on his line and grimaced
As young Naughton was ripped to pieces
Suarez scored another goal
Benny LOL'd Benny LOL'd Benny LOL'd

And we didn't even put up a fight
In the biting North London cold
And it was such a sorry sight
As Paulie got an early cab home

Our Champions League hopes are dying
And without a Bale to rely on
We'll never score another goal
Benny LOL'd, Benny LOL'd, Benny LOL'd


ekotto1.jpg
 
Daniel the (Never) Red nosed chairman by Enter the Pitbull

Daniel the (Never) Red nosed chairman
Had a very shiny head
And if you ever crossed him
He would even say "you're dead"

All of the other Chairmen
Used to laugh and call him names
They never let poor Daniel
Play in any CL games.

Then one foggy white hart eve
Andre came to say
I can get you to the top
Even though I'm Chelsea flop

Then all the Yiddos loved him
And they shouted out with glee
Daniel the (Never) Red nosed Chairman
You'll go down in history
(not).
 
To the tune of all the ladies favourite Mariah crimbo song.

'I dont want a lot this christmas there is just one thing I need'

'aaaaaand I'

'dont care about the gooners even though their top of the league'

'i just want a manager we can call our own'
'to bring success like weve never known'
'Daniel make my wish come true'
'oooooo daniel all I want for christmas is (insert name of preferred mangerial candidate here)'

oooooooooooooo baby!!!!
 
My GHod these songs have gone from fantastic, to good, to fairly average to just plain awful.

Just to carry on with the pattern of getting progressively worse I'm going to throw my hat into the ring with a song which isn't even a xmas one.

The only way is up, Levy
For you and me, Levy
The only way is up
For you and me

Now we may not known
Where our next manager is coming from

But with you by my side
I'll face what is come
Levy, I wanna thank you
for sacking Andre
things may be a little hard now
but we'll find a brighter day
Hold on, Hold on, Hold on

The only way is up, Levy etc.....
 
a riff pilchard classic:::::::

'christmas time, mistletoe & wine'

'we cant play a high defensive line'

'dawson turning like an oil tanker'

'and gaffs from lloris'

'beatings from pool and Emirates Marketing Project'

\o/

p.s creativity should be encouraged on this forum not mocked!!!:)
 
Last edited:
Since nigeyman said creativity should be encouraged even in the absence of talent (or words to that effect ;))

Last Christmas I gave you my heart,
But the very next spring you gave it away.
This year, to save me from tears,
I'm hoping for some Spalletti

No Harry and no AVB
I keep hoping, but you still let me down.
Tell me Levy, do you recognize him?
Well, it's been a while since Frankie was at Barca

"Happy signing" I wrapped it up and sent it
With a note saying "I trust you" I meant it.
Now I know what a fool I've been,
But if you sign Bielsa now I'd smile again

[chorus]

Oooohhhh
Oh oh Levy

A crowded stand, friends with tired eyes,
I'm hiding from wham and their soul of ice
My GHod, I thought Andre was someone to rely on,
Now? I guess we need a Sherwood to cry on

A face of a lover with a fire in his heart
Pochettino, he can rip teams apart
Oh oh now we'll find a new love
We will be happy again.
 
braineclipse said:
Since nigeyman said creativity should be encouraged even in the absence of talent (or words to that effect ;))

Last Christmas I gave you my heart,
But the very next spring you gave it away.
This year, to save me from tears,
I'm hoping for some Spalletti

No Harry and no AVB
I keep hoping, but you still let me down.
Tell me Levy, do you recognize him?
Well, it's been a while since Frankie was at Barca

"Happy signing" I wrapped it up and sent it
With a note saying "I trust you" I meant it.
Now I know what a fool I've been,
But if you sign Bielsa now I'd smile again

[chorus]

Oooohhhh
Oh oh Levy

A crowded stand, friends with tired eyes,
I'm hiding from wham and their soul of ice
My GHod, I thought Andre was someone to rely on,
Now? I guess we need a Sherwood to cry on

A face of a lover with a fire in his heart
Pochettino, he can rip teams apart
Oh oh now we'll find a new love
We will be happy again.
Click to expand...


:lol:
 
The jury's out
The fans are down
The game's my favourite buttplug
The manager's a clown

Simply having a Wormtongue Christmas time
Simply having a Wormtongue Christmas time
 
:ross: \o/:ross:

last christmas we had van der vaart.......the very next summer you gave him away.

\o/
 
Frosty the Chairman
Was a grumpy little soul
When we lost five nil and they scored at will
He watched each and every goal

Frosty the Chairman
Said to Andre "on your bike"
Then he said "Hey Tim
You seem nice but dim
And you're cheap - that's what I like"

There must have been some signings that old Andre didn't rate
For when the press asked if they're his
He told them "not mine mate"

O!

Frosty the Chairman
Isn't scared to wield the axe
But the squad's a joke
And morale is broke
Like a deadline day Spurs fax.
 
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