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The csa

Nigeyman

Chris Armstrong
The child support agency...... where do I even begin with this..........words fail me due to utter F***ing blind rage!!

I am now having to prove that I see my daughter every other weekend due to the csa's incompetance in telling my partner a figure which was not inclusive of shared care! she has now been activated by the greed monster and is swearing blind that I dont look after my little girl 52 nights a year! apparently she gets to sit back and doesnt have to prove anything while I have to suffer the indignation being accused of being a poor father who doesnt pay or see his child.

So never mind the fact that since sept last year up to now she has had 2200 off me in payments....or the fact she decided to get the csa involved when my daughter was 12 due to me being out of work (kicking when i was down)

They are seriously an incompetant bunch of wan**rs.

I have worked out everything fairly and have always paid for my child! my ex gets them to waste their time by asking them to contact me a few weeks back knowing full well I was on my honeymoon! she alo gets to lie to a government agency make untrue allegations but doesnt have to prove anything!!!!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGGHH sorry people......if anyone's got a spare Batman cossie Ill be off to bucks palace!
 
The child support agency...... where do I even begin with this..........words fail me due to utter F***ing blind rage!!

I am now having to prove that I see my daughter every other weekend due to the csa's incompetance in telling my partner a figure which was not inclusive of shared care! she has now been activated by the greed monster and is swearing blind that I dont look after my little girl 52 nights a year! apparently she gets to sit back and doesnt have to prove anything while I have to suffer the indignation being accused of being a poor father who doesnt pay or see his child.

So never mind the fact that since sept last year up to now she has had 2200 off me in payments....or the fact she decided to get the csa involved when my daughter was 12 due to me being out of work (kicking when i was down)

They are seriously an incompetant bunch of wan**rs.

I have worked out everything fairly and have always paid for my child! my ex gets them to waste their time by asking them to contact me a few weeks back knowing full well I was on my honeymoon! she alo gets to lie to a government agency make untrue allegations but doesnt have to prove anything!!!!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGGHH sorry people......if anyone's got a spare Batman cossie Ill be off to bucks palace!


Don't get me started on these cnuts .... they and solicitors are scum and were nearly responsible for ensuring my kids grew up without a father !!!!

Luckily i won in court and got shared custody, wasn't through lack of the ex trying to stop me seeing my kids and wanting to screw every penny out of me.

Why? Exactly like you said, she went to see her solicitor and her solicitor explained that if she stopped me having the children she would be able to go to the csa and get a lot more than the £500 a month i was giving her. No thought for the children, no thoughts for me the father, disgusting, disgraceful. Once she instructed the csa that was it, they wrote to me twice, i ignored the first letter, the second my solicitor told me i should reply. When i did i got a nice surprise the following month having over £3k taken out of my bank account, apparently i owed 4 months and i would be paying £780 a month thereafter.....

Now when i broke up with my ex we were actually getting on better than we ever had, we agreed shared custody, i would give her the £500 a month, let her stay in the house, keep everything in it, even the car i let her drive, i was even buying the kids clothes etc....... i just wanted shared custody. Funny that she actually told me at one point i could have full custody, she'd never been much of a parent, i always got them ready in a morning did the nursery run etc before work......

Without going into too much detail i ended up having to disprove her lies, which i did and the karma of it all ..... when i won in court and got shared custody, i no longer had to pay her any csa, in fact she owed me from over payment, she had to give up the house, she lost the lot....... all through greed, bitterness and hate.

We haven't spoke in 8 years since it happened, suits me, i moved on, the kids are my life when they're with me, she'll always be bitter.... KARMA WOMAN!!!

If i can give you some advice its write down every weekend you've had your daughter, every date, go see a solicitor and get it in writing. If it gets to the court stage unless there's any reason not to they'll usually agree that the situation should be as it has been since your breakup, what your daughters been used to. Trust me though you'll be made out to be a liar, feel like no one believes or supports you, not even your own solicitor. Stand your ground and go after what you feel is your right.......

Hope it works out mate.
 
Don't get me started on these cnuts .... they and solicitors are scum and were nearly responsible for ensuring my kids grew up without a father !!!!

Luckily i won in court and got shared custody, wasn't through lack of the ex trying to stop me seeing my kids and wanting to screw every penny out of me.

Why? Exactly like you said, she went to see her solicitor and her solicitor explained that if she stopped me having the children she would be able to go to the csa and get a lot more than the £500 a month i was giving her. No thought for the children, no thoughts for me the father, disgusting, disgraceful. Once she instructed the csa that was it, they wrote to me twice, i ignored the first letter, the second my solicitor told me i should reply. When i did i got a nice surprise the following month having over £3k taken out of my bank account, apparently i owed 4 months and i would be paying £780 a month thereafter.....

Now when i broke up with my ex we were actually getting on better than we ever had, we agreed shared custody, i would give her the £500 a month, let her stay in the house, keep everything in it, even the car i let her drive, i was even buying the kids clothes etc....... i just wanted shared custody. Funny that she actually told me at one point i could have full custody, she'd never been much of a parent, i always got them ready in a morning did the nursery run etc before work......

Without going into too much detail i ended up having to disprove her lies, which i did and the karma of it all ..... when i won in court and got shared custody, i no longer had to pay her any csa, in fact she owed me from over payment, she had to give up the house, she lost the lot....... all through greed, bitterness and hate.

We haven't spoke in 8 years since it happened, suits me, i moved on, the kids are my life when they're with me, she'll always be bitter.... KARMA WOMAN!!!

If i can give you some advice its write down every weekend you've had your daughter, every date, go see a solicitor and get it in writing. If it gets to the court stage unless there's any reason not to they'll usually agree that the situation should be as it has been since your breakup, what your daughters been used to. Trust me though you'll be made out to be a liar, feel like no one believes or supports you, not even your own solicitor. Stand your ground and go after what you feel is your right.......

Hope it works out mate.

Thanks for that buddy....just a quick question I have documentation from our solicitors back in sept 04 when we split where it outlines my contact arrangments as alternate weekens fri night and sat night back sun evening and extra time during the holidays....that I have told them! however my ex likes to mess around with my weekends and takes her away and tells me I can do eff all about it and when I ask to make up the lost weekend she refuses.

Going through the last year I will have had her less than 52 nights per year.....

do I provide dates still or will the letters from the solicitors be sufficient by themselves? or should I give both sets of information explaining that the agreement is what it is but that my ex partner breaks it at certain intervals?

just not happy that I get the double whammy of paying her for the time when my daughter is in my care and also having to endure her constantly planning things for her on my weekends or just telling my I cant have her and cant swap weekends.
 
Don't have kids myself so can't offer much advice but though it's not much help will say that from what you've posted on this section in the last few months seems to suggest you get things sorted.

The way things like this can be weighed so that a mother is deemed a untouchable and benevolent figure in childs parentage whilst a father is guilty till proven innocent is disgusting.
 
Been there,done that and lost the t-shirt....

I've heard the rules are changing and the csa is being wound down,the government want each partner to sort out their own issues rather than use the csa now,

http://gingerbread.org.uk/content/969/Changes-to-child-maintenance

Its strange when i read stories about how women are a bunch of cnuts sometimes when they seperate from their partner and its the same either if the man walks out as it is if the woman walks out,no difference in their attutudes. If they walk out for some made up reasons or just because they had a mid-life crisis they should be accountable for their actions and not be a cnut and take their husband to the cleaners because he wants equal rights to see his children.Its amazing sometimes how women think that men haven't got the same empathy as they do regarding their children as if its some exclusive right they've only got.....
 
Don't get me started on these cnuts .... they and solicitors are scum and were nearly responsible for ensuring my kids grew up without a father !!!!

Luckily i won in court and got shared custody, wasn't through lack of the ex trying to stop me seeing my kids and wanting to screw every penny out of me.

Why? Exactly like you said, she went to see her solicitor and her solicitor explained that if she stopped me having the children she would be able to go to the csa and get a lot more than the £500 a month i was giving her. No thought for the children, no thoughts for me the father, disgusting, disgraceful. Once she instructed the csa that was it, they wrote to me twice, i ignored the first letter, the second my solicitor told me i should reply. When i did i got a nice surprise the following month having over £3k taken out of my bank account, apparently i owed 4 months and i would be paying £780 a month thereafter.....

Now when i broke up with my ex we were actually getting on better than we ever had, we agreed shared custody, i would give her the £500 a month, let her stay in the house, keep everything in it, even the car i let her drive, i was even buying the kids clothes etc....... i just wanted shared custody. Funny that she actually told me at one point i could have full custody, she'd never been much of a parent, i always got them ready in a morning did the nursery run etc before work......

Without going into too much detail i ended up having to disprove her lies, which i did and the karma of it all ..... when i won in court and got shared custody, i no longer had to pay her any csa, in fact she owed me from over payment, she had to give up the house, she lost the lot....... all through greed, bitterness and hate.

We haven't spoke in 8 years since it happened, suits me, i moved on, the kids are my life when they're with me, she'll always be bitter.... KARMA WOMAN!!!

If i can give you some advice its write down every weekend you've had your daughter, every date, go see a solicitor and get it in writing. If it gets to the court stage unless there's any reason not to they'll usually agree that the situation should be as it has been since your breakup, what your daughters been used to. Trust me though you'll be made out to be a liar, feel like no one believes or supports you, not even your own solicitor. Stand your ground and go after what you feel is your right.......

Hope it works out mate.

We agree on something! Identical experience to me. I paid out over half of the assets. Wife never did a days work in her life. She had the kids nine days a fortnight. within 18 months she had squandered the lot, was homeless and I now have my two girls full time. Going through court was the most traumatic experience of my life. I had 13 appearances due to the mad bitch and her money hungry solicitor. Guess where most of my cash went? This unethical bitch stole the bread from my daughter's mouths.
 
Been there,done that and lost the t-shirt....

I've heard the rules are changing and the csa is being wound down,the government want each partner to sort out their own issues rather than use the csa now,

http://gingerbread.org.uk/content/969/Changes-to-child-maintenance

Its strange when i read stories about how women are a bunch of cnuts sometimes when they seperate from their partner and its the same either if the man walks out as it is if the woman walks out,no difference in their attutudes. If they walk out for some made up reasons or just because they had a mid-life crisis they should be accountable for their actions and not be a cnut and take their husband to the cleaners because he wants equal rights to see his children.Its amazing sometimes how women think that men haven't got the same empathy as they do regarding their children as if its some exclusive right they've only got.....

great 20% alongside payments....how in the world of doggie style am I meant to live when 35% of my net is being sucked from me?

oh lordy....yep two adults should be able to a agree a fair set-up.....I keep trying but my ex wont budge...she's determined to use them when we havent needed too for 12 years....
 
Thanks for that buddy....just a quick question I have documentation from our solicitors back in sept 04 when we split where it outlines my contact arrangments as alternate weekens fri night and sat night back sun evening and extra time during the holidays....that I have told them! however my ex likes to mess around with my weekends and takes her away and tells me I can do eff all about it and when I ask to make up the lost weekend she refuses.

Going through the last year I will have had her less than 52 nights per year.....

do I provide dates still or will the letters from the solicitors be sufficient by themselves? or should I give both sets of information explaining that the agreement is what it is but that my ex partner breaks it at certain intervals?

just not happy that I get the double whammy of paying her for the time when my daughter is in my care and also having to endure her constantly planning things for her on my weekends or just telling my I cant have her and cant swap weekends.

Sorry you didn't make it clear are the dates that you have from your solicitor in 04 as a result of you going to Family court? If they were then the next time your meant to have your daughter and she doesn't let you, phone the police and tell them. Thats what i did, i'd gone through a period of about 5 months where she hardly let me see the kids while the court case was running. Once i won shared custody (GHod that sounds bad doesn't it i won shared custody of my kids, how bad is that......) anyway once i got shared custody the first time she tried to play funny games and not bring them i phoned the police and told them she was in contempt of a court order. They tracked her down and she soon had them with me, she hasn't messed around since.

If they weren't done as a result of court action, then by all means show the agreement from the solicitor, her solicitor though will tell her to say you haven't had your daughter and she'll be telling the csa this. You might not want to hear this but your probably going to have to take her to court to get more access to your daughter and to get it official so she can't mess you around anymore. Until you have that as a court order, the csa will just take her word for it and you will have to prove otherwise. Its wrong and the csa are awful to deal with, they treat the man like a piece of ****, like he's the one that will have done something wrong and hasn't supported the child.

My advice would always be get to court and get a court order, if your not working at the moment you'll get legal aid. My ex did, she was loving the fact that i had to pay my solicitor, all in all it cost me £25k, but i'd have spent very penny i ever earned for my two.
 
We agree on something! Identical experience to me. I paid out over half of the assets. Wife never did a days work in her life. She had the kids nine days a fortnight. within 18 months she had squandered the lot, was homeless and I now have my two girls full time. Going through court was the most traumatic experience of my life. I had 13 appearances due to the mad bitch and her money hungry solicitor. Guess where most of my cash went? This unethical bitch stole the bread from my daughter's mouths.

I remember whilst my court case was ongoing, i was out with my family having a meal and in the same restaurant her solicitor was having a meal with a male partner/friend? I wanted to go over and tell her how people like her ruined lives, ruined children's lives, i could have gone ballistic with her, i was so angry, but my mum calmed me down........ The day i won in court i took great pride walking past her and and my ex with her family, i just smiled to myself and thought **** you your not getting a rise out of me.
 
Get a DNA test, with any luck the kids won't be yours so you wont have to pay. I took some of my sons hair and sent away for a DNA test when he was ****ing me off a couple of years ago.

Turns out the little rascal is mine, if he werent I would have left the wife and fcuked off some place hot, still we got to live with the cards we are dealt with in life.

In answer to the original post, is murder completely out of the question?
 
LOL the child is mine and though sometimes it feels tempting I couldnt bear to break my daughters heart by topping off her mother.

On a serious note this is all a pit plop really...I havent attained a court order and I have always mistrusted solicitors since I saw the effects they had when my parents split up. either way ill see how it goes.

pretty rubbish really when you feel powerless and like the odds are stacked against you just to get a bit of fairness.....but I am compiling all my documents so ill guess ill have to see what happens. What would be nice would be if I could sleep...stop worrying about her messing up my time with my daughter and stop worrying about whether im about to get financially rogered!
 
Note to self - Do not break up with the missus.

Lol....yeah you may be able to say that but with a woman,theirs two hurdles that trigger their decision,when they turn 40 and when the kids are able to start looking after themselves....then its like and on -off switch,it won't matter if you wiped her feet for her and carried her around for the last twenty years once that switch is on off she'll start making moves to part with you and in the meantime the husband is totally oblivious to all of this because he thinks everything is just a ok and that the misses is just a bit moody. She wants you out ASAP and all she wants is the kids and the house so she can start her life again with another sucker that will carry her around for the next part of her life. If we stand up ourselfs then we are prolonging her decision and then as a child she'll start calling you names and lie abourt certain issues with the knowledge that the courts will always back the woman meaning she'll have all the aces in her hand and your just basically defending yourself on things that don't matter and all you want is just to see your kids ,thats it.

All i say start having a secret savings account and by the time you need a solicitor you'll have some money to pay the bills!!!
 
Lol....yeah you may be able to say that but with a woman,theirs two hurdles that trigger their decision,when they turn 40 and when the kids are able to start looking after themselves....then its like and on -off switch,it won't matter if you wiped her feet for her and carried her around for the last twenty years once that switch is on off she'll start making moves to part with you and in the meantime the husband is totally oblivious to all of this because he thinks everything is just a ok and that the misses is just a bit moody. She wants you out ASAP and all she wants is the kids and the house so she can start her life again with another sucker that will carry her around for the next part of her life. If we stand up ourselfs then we are prolonging her decision and then as a child she'll start calling you names and lie abourt certain issues with the knowledge that the courts will always back the woman meaning she'll have all the aces in her hand and your just basically defending yourself on things that don't matter and all you want is just to see your kids ,thats it.

All i say start having a secret savings account and by the time you need a solicitor you'll have some money to pay the bills!!!

Until the kids start asking questions why daddy not around and then the kids suffer from finding out the truth
 
I looked at my bank account and saw a cash withdrawal from a teller machine miles from where we lived. Quizzed the missus and she said she out that way visiting her niece, (first time ever) anyway when we went to court found out her solicitor's office was in this town. This was six months before we broke up. Found out lots of other preparations, mainly financial.
 
I looked at my bank account and saw a cash withdrawal from a teller machine miles from where we lived. Quizzed the missus and she said she out that way visiting her niece, (first time ever) anyway when we went to court found out her solicitor's office was in this town. This was six months before we broke up. Found out lots of other preparations, mainly financial.

This was a shared bank account?
 
I looked at my bank account and saw a cash withdrawal from a teller machine miles from where we lived. Quizzed the missus and she said she out that way visiting her niece, (first time ever) anyway when we went to court found out her solicitor's office was in this town. This was six months before we broke up. Found out lots of other preparations, mainly financial.

Women are sneeky they are great at lying to our face with a smile on it. I vowed to never trust one after my first divorce, and to this day I still don't.
 
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