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Does anyone suffer from mental illness on here?

Thank you mate. It may sound silly but reading your post on a football forum means more than you can imagine. I was very honest with my other half last night, she thought I had been going to meetings this week but reality was I was drinking. I'm realising that my trigger seems to be depression. We went to Iceland last week and had the most wonderful time, as soon as I got back I convinced myself that I was a bad person who didn't deserve to be happy and enjoy such a great experience.

Mate you're one of the most intelligent and balanced people on this forum. Intelligent and morally sound.
 
Why not give these guys a call https://www.thecalmzone.net/

It's all anonymous, might as well give it a chance, see what it's like

As part of my job I spent today at a men’s mental health conference (in Finsbury Park of all places) - The Calm Zone was mentioned a couple of times as a great place to contact if struggling.

The stats for how many men are dealing with mental health issues are beyond belief. Although we’ve got better at opening up about it all there’s a hell of a long way still to go.
 
The stats for how many men are dealing with mental health issues are beyond belief. Although we’ve got better at opening up about it all there’s a hell of a long way still to go.

I'm currently under a therapist to try and help out with some issues at home with my partners kid (It's massively working btw), she told me that 3 times as many men commit suicide than women, crazy stats really
 
Thank you mate. It may sound silly but reading your post on a football forum means more than you can imagine. I was very honest with my other half last night, she thought I had been going to meetings this week but reality was I was drinking. I'm realising that my trigger seems to be depression. We went to Iceland last week and had the most wonderful time, as soon as I got back I convinced myself that I was a bad person who didn't deserve to be happy and enjoy such a great experience.
Heart breaking mate. You're wonderful.

Good for you identifying a trigger and some of the stuff your head does to put you down.
 
Sincerely appreciate all your kind words and advice. It's overwhelming but not surprising that you would take the time on this forum to help out your fellow members. I will definitely check out the calmzone. In a much better place so far this week, I shared for the first time in as long as I can remember at AA, and my other half has been next-level supportive.

I recently read this book, I found it really helped give me some clarity on the negative feelings I sometimes surround myself with.


For anyone that hasn't read it and suffers from depression/anxiety, I would highly recommend it.
 
Sincerely appreciate all your kind words and advice. It's overwhelming but not surprising that you would take the time on this forum to help out your fellow members. I will definitely check out the calmzone. In a much better place so far this week, I shared for the first time in as long as I can remember at AA, and my other half has been next-level supportive.

I recently read this book, I found it really helped give me some clarity on the negative feelings I sometimes surround myself with.


For anyone that hasn't read it and suffers from depression/anxiety, I would highly recommend it.
I second that book.
I would go so far as to say that book kept me alive. It was just like talking to a friend that understood what was inside my head in a way noone else could. And of course you can interact with it at whatever pace works for you.
 
I used to be scared of death, now I spend too many days wishing that I would. That's my life now. I exist, I feel stuck and that I have little power to change my life. So, the clock keeps ticking, and I'm just waiting on one of my internal organs to fail.

I look at myself, and feel ashamed that I feel like this. Many want to live, but will not see beyond the end of the week for medical reasons, or old age, whilst tragedy will befall others.

Yet, my feelings of apathy towards life never really subside.
 
I have depression and anxiety and am taking 200mg of sertraline daily to combat it. I have good and bad days and if I'm honest, if I didn't have spurs running through my veins I don't know what I would do cos they honestly keep me going.

I've been through a lot and am willing to chat to anyone who wants to :)

Sent from my SM-G935F using glory-glory.co.uk mobile app
 
I have depression and anxiety and am taking 200mg of sertraline daily to combat it. I have good and bad days and if I'm honest, if I didn't have spurs running through my veins I don't know what I would do cos they honestly keep me going.

I've been through a lot and am willing to chat to anyone who wants to :)

Sent from my SM-G935F using glory-glory.co.uk mobile app

How do you find the medication? I used to take Citalopram but it didn't make much difference. Now I'm taking nothing. My moods can be off the wall. I snap at people, and overreact. I feel stifled by too much activity in my head. It's like, if someone asks me a question, I won't just get be a straight answer but will instead calculate all the permutation before giving a weird answer. I struggle to relax, and I take criticism as people telling me that I'm rubbish, almost as if they are lashing out at me. I don't like where my head is but have no idea how to be any different and so my behaviour frustrates me when I know that I'm not acting rationally or have not acted rationally. And that sinks me further.
 
Really struggling at the moment with my alcoholism. I'm trying to do the right things, seeing a therapist and kind of going to AA. I don't have a sponsor though and I'm not sharing when I am at meetings. That needs to happen, I just feel a bit lost at the moment. I have been dating a lovely, amazing woman who understands and is supportive of all my issues, I just don't feel like I am doing justice to the relationship.

And then I read Chich's post and realise that life is what you make of it. It was inspiring dude. Thanks for sharing x


I understand the 'not sharing' but in my own family I have seen the enormous difference when one decides to finally share that baggage. It literally lightened this person's psychic load to the point she was physically less impacted by her anxiety. Read through the thread and saw your further thoughts and comments.

Again, I have experience dealing with this within my own tribe...besides the anxiety and depression (both major of course) sounds to me like you have to start liking yourself a bit more and giving yourself permission to
be liked
make the off mistake
not be perfect
try your best as best can be
Sounds easy but I have seen how hard it is. This is different to being a narcissist, it is simply about allowing yourself to be treated as a normal human being. Not sure what happened to put you in the 'guilt space' but whatever it is, talk about it with someone (I'm sure you are) and have them help you realize it is not yours to carry endlessly through time.
It reads to me like you're not doing yourself justice in the relationship to allow the relationship to be one where everyone is happy. Your good lady can only walk through the door if you open it, and you will only do the relationship justice if you give yourself a break, embrace your flaws and realize that despite all that you must be a pretty great bloke because hey, she ain't there for the food, she's there because she likes you!!!!!! Let that settle in. Give yourself permission to acknowledge it mate.

One other thing before I go...it is NEVER the 'problem' or 'mistake' or perceived 'fudge-u'...it's how you respond to it/them. Because mate, we ALL run into them. It's being human. And it's also being human to not only accept the responsibility and learn, but to recognize that it is OK to walk that path, you're still a good bloke, that many many people do and that it is a part of all our lives.

Good luck and COYS
 
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Does anyone have any advice on managing their time and energy?

Since feeling suicidal and coming out the other end and deciding I will stay alive (about a year ago),. I have developed ultimate fear missing out.
So Plan something to do everything single day. I don't know how to relax anymore.
I even scheduled a relax day at the weekend and just paced around the house.

It's destroyed my energy. Feel constantly exhausted.
 
Have you thought about exercise?

Be that cardio/running/classes - they always have a habit of
A) organising your schedule, to a degree and
B) wearing you out, so relaxing is much easier (and necessary).

And, after the practicalities, it has an amazing way of boosting your self worth, positivity and general outlook.
 
I'm currently under a therapist to try and help out with some issues at home with my partners kid (It's massively working btw), she told me that 3 times as many men commit suicide than women, crazy stats really

Globally about twice as many men die from suicide than Woman while 2- 4 times more suicide attempts are made by woman.

Differences are explained by the method Men tend to use vs Women or the difference between a cry for help and actually deciding to end.

Crazy stats either way and only just getting publicity.
 
I understand the 'not sharing' but in my own family I have seen the enormous difference when one decides to finally share that baggage. It literally lightened this person's psychic load to the point she was physically less impacted by her anxiety. Read through the thread and saw your further thoughts and comments.

Again, I have experience dealing with this within my own tribe...besides the anxiety and depression (both major of course) sounds to me like you have to start liking yourself a bit more and giving yourself permission to
be liked
make the off mistake
not be perfect
try your best as best can be
Sounds easy but I have seen how hard it is. This is different to being a narcissist, it is simply about allowing yourself to be treated as a normal human being. Not sure what happened to put you in the 'guilt space' but whatever it is, talk about it with someone (I'm sure you are) and have them help you realize it is not yours to carry endlessly through time.
It reads to me like you're not doing yourself justice in the relationship to allow the relationship to be one where everyone is happy. Your good lady can only walk through the door if you open it, and you will only do the relationship justice if you give yourself a break, embrace your flaws and realize that despite all that you must be a pretty great bloke because hey, she ain't there for the food, she's there because she likes you!!!!!! Let that settle in. Give yourself permission to acknowledge it mate.

One other thing before I go...it is NEVER the 'problem' or 'mistake' or perceived 'fudge-u'...it's how you respond to it/them. Because mate, we ALL run into them. It's being human. And it's also being human to not only accept the responsibility and learn, but to recognize that it is OK to walk that path, you're still a good bloke, that many many people do and that it is a part of all our lives.

Good luck and COYS
In times not so long ago.....signing off with COYS would have sunk the person back into reality and no doubt depression:)

How times have changed......a club to be proud of, top to bottom.

COYS

Ps lovely post @thfcsteff
 
Does anyone have any advice on managing their time and energy?

Since feeling suicidal and coming out the other end and deciding I will stay alive (about a year ago),. I have developed ultimate fear missing out.
So Plan something to do everything single day. I don't know how to relax anymore.
I even scheduled a relax day at the weekend and just paced around the house.

It's destroyed my energy. Feel constantly exhausted.

I have similar problems with energy levels.

If I have a day when I do nothing just am indoors literally all day then I know I will not sleep that night. I have to be tired like near exhausted before I will sleep, it has been like that for 30 years.

Getting a full nights sleep is so important for your health, it is important to go out and have a social life at the weekends or week nights but it is so important to have a routine and get enough sleep.
 
Have you thought about exercise?

Be that cardio/running/classes - they always have a habit of
A) organising your schedule, to a degree and
B) wearing you out, so relaxing is much easier (and necessary).

And, after the practicalities, it has an amazing way of boosting your self worth, positivity and general outlook.
I play a team sport once a week, which is good. It's more that I need to overcome massive FOMO. I just cram so much in.
So I no have no idea how to relax and also have insomnia, both linked to being scared that I'll wake up and want to end it again.
Living for the now is exhausting!! Ha.
 
In times not so long ago.....signing off with COYS would have sunk the person back into reality and no doubt depression:)

How times have changed......a club to be proud of, top to bottom.

COYS

Ps lovely post @thfcsteff

Thanks my friend. This thread, and this community, had really grown hugely I think. Scara, Milo, Jordy and many others have helped flip it from a tempestuous flare-war 8 or so years ago, into what it is today. This thread is wonderful. We can all share experiences from our lives and discuss some deep issues openly. I agree mate...how times have changed and everyone here is part of that! COYS


Sitting on my porcelain throne using glory-glory.co.uk mobile app
 
I play a team sport once a week, which is good. It's more that I need to overcome massive FOMO. I just cram so much in.
So I no have no idea how to relax and also have insomnia, both linked to being scared that I'll wake up and want to end it again.
Living for the now is exhausting!! Ha.

I can certainly try to help here, but it requires a weirdly simple, yet difficult, approach to life...

Put simply, find peace with the fact you will miss out on something everyday, but to focus on that means that whatever you are doing receives a double knock; your lack of focus on it and your energy being spent on something you cannot experience.

Meditation is the way, and it takes many many forms. You don’t just sit in a dark space with yer eyes closed, sometimes it can just be a minute or two. Eyes open. Imagine you biggest fomo fears for the day, let them pass before your very eyes and march off into space. It is no failure to ‘miss out’ on things, indeed, it is often a huge success not to get sucked into thinking you can do everything. You can’t!!!

My wife constantly thinks of all the places she wants to go but will not be able to. She is sometimes scared by it!!! I travel a fair amount for what I do, but realize that time, economics and in some cases, me, will prevent me from seeing everything I want to experience or see. I would love to see the tiger trail in Bhutan, or Everest base camp or polar bears in Manitoba. I would love to take the Trans Siberian Express!!! I probably won’t do those things. But it is OK, because I do some great things and have done for decades!

Fomo is a modern thing for sure, the thought that missing out is ‘bad’ or ‘uncool’...I think ‘missing out’ is sometimes an incredible experience in itself!!!


Good luck mate!









Sitting on my porcelain throne using glory-glory.co.uk mobile app
 
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