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Does being a good person hinder you in life?

K

Kingdawson

Banned
In terms of work? relationships just everything really. Can you 'make it' being a decent and kind person all your life or do you need a bit of a darkside in order to have really 'made it'?


I ask this because i genuinly consider myself to be a kind hearted person but the people around me (be it work or social life) seem to have some sort of 'dodgy' side to them that seems to help them achieve more and more. I mean i'm happy with my job, happy with my personal life, happy with everything really but sometimes i do think to myself 'how does he get away with this all the time' or think that how fair is it that the person that's well lets just say being dodgy seems to be getting far more than i am being 100% straight. Meh i don't know.
 
I asked my old man this question a couple of years ago. He quickly gave me a resounding "NO". But he said you have to be nice with a bit of steel. You can't be nice to the point where you get shat on from everybody, but every now and then, I believe you have to blow up at somebody and show that you won't be taken for a mug. Don't get me wrong, you do have to be a bit ruthless in certain situations, especially when it comes to work, but that doesn't mean you have to be a complete **** to get ahead in life. A bit of luck is also required in my opinion too.

That's my two cents.
 
Nothing wrong with being nice and some of the nice guys get ahead. My own experince is that once i became cynical i started to make a brick load more money.
 
Kingdawson said:
In terms of work? relationships just everything really. Can you 'make it' being a decent and kind person all your life or do you need a bit of a darkside in order to have really 'made it'?


I ask this because i genuinly consider myself to be a kind hearted person but the people around me (be it work or social life) seem to have some sort of 'dodgy' side to them that seems to help them achieve more and more. I mean i'm happy with my job, happy with my personal life, happy with everything really but sometimes i do think to myself 'how does he get away with this all the time' or think that how fair is it that the person that's well lets just say being dodgy seems to be getting far more than i am being 100% straight. Meh i don't know.
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i worked for some absolute ****s to over the years but a nice guy who tries to be a **** to get ahead will not be able to carry it off, only a life long **** can be a real ****
 
Try being a decent, honest, loveable rouge

But never a c*nt

You need to have a little bit of bastard in you, otherwise you will get nowhere with women and work

But it's not necessary to be a complete c*nt
 
I agree, i'm someone who looks out for other people and always looking to help out...
After all this i have realised one thing... It is easier for people to take advantage of you albeit my fault for allowing it, but i believe as a whole you can. Although you need to add a steel nerve to it to make sure you're not taken for granted... Otherwise, I love being this sort of person, make me fell better about myself when i know i've helped someone.
 
All depends on what you consider as people who 'make it' or are successful. What's being happy about. You said your happy. I know guys who are driving Bentley's have a lovely house but his marriage is going to brick. Don't know if that makes him happy or not. You only become envious of others when you constantly benchmark yourself against them.

If being naughty, a ****, evil appeals to your nature then that's the way it is. Ballsy, ****y people are usually extroverts and they do tend to stand out, whereas good honest people may tend to stay quiet as they more humble. I don't know, it's very subjective
 
I definitely think that you can't afford to be a doormat in life and let people walk all over you. I think that you need to give everyone a chance but know when enough is enough and time to walk on. If you keep ignoring people's indiscretions then you will be thought of as forgiving but people will step further and further out of line until they have mugged you over. That is true in any form of life, any situation, you need to have confidence to know who you are and what you are about and then don't apologise for who you are, but if you step out of line then be truly sorry, and don't let people take the tinkle too much; stand up for what you are about and what you believe in and people won't walk all over you.
 
I have always lived to the motto that everyone is out for what they can get, as long as they keep away from what i have then its fine. But i trust people as far as i can throw them and its never done me any harm.
 
If you said 'nice' instead of 'good' then yeah I would have said yes yes it does hinder you.

Being good just means normal right?

I am both ends of the spectrum, there is never a happy medium with me. Im either too nice or too rude, i find it difficult to get the balance and its that balance that I guess is 'good'.
 
I'm not 'nice' but i'm ethical and my decisions are transparent.

I tell all people what I think and i'm consistent, I follow my head rather than my heart.......the idea that you need to be a taco to get ahead, as evidenced by the utter cretins that are on The Apprentice every year, is totally false.

In business you need the ability to build trust and rapport with internal and external staff and clients more than basically any other skill.

Not the attributes of a c**t!
 
In my line of work, there are a few different career paths. Some of which involve trying to do good for the world, others involve 'selling out' and doing a job which helps a massive company make a lot of money, but ultimately causes more harm than good to society.

I could double my salary (and then some) if I moved over to the dark side. But I don't think it would make me happy, so I haven't even considered it.

Does that equate to being 'hindered'? Maybe. But I'd rather achieve less 'success' whilst remaining proud of what I do and the way that I do it.
 
I think you need to be an arse occasionally or people will walk all over you. I've been guilty of being too nice in the past and even friends take advantage of it.
 
No. Go with Karma. If your decision making is sound and based on research then you have as much a chance as anyone. You sometimes need to step out of your comfort zone and take a risk here or there but that is a long way from not being a decent person. Be Righteous.
 
nw7 yid said:
In my line of work, there are a few different career paths. Some of which involve trying to do good for the world, others involve 'selling out' and doing a job which helps a massive company make a lot of money, but ultimately causes more harm than good to society.

I could double my salary (and then some) if I moved over to the dark side. But I don't think it would make me happy, so I haven't even considered it.

Does that equate to being 'hindered'? Maybe. But I'd rather achieve less 'success' whilst remaining proud of what I do and the way that I do it.
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Are you saying all corporations do bad things? Not disagreeing but how will we save the world and cure poverty without philanthropists and corporate taxes.
 
Dorothy said:
No. Go with Karma. If your decision making is sound and based on research then you have as much a chance as anyone. You sometimes need to step out of your comfort zone and take a risk here or there but that is a long way from not being a decent person. Be Righteous.
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That's essentially the motto I live my life by. I am all for social justice, and while I like the idea of universal karma, too many innocent people have been punished at the hands of the greedy few. I also try to be humble (or at least not TOO ****y), perhaps because I mock those that celebrate completing the most trivial flimflam.

Leeds Spur said:
Are you saying all corporations do bad things? Not disagreeing but how will we save the world and cure poverty without philanthropists and corporate taxes.
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:ross:
Corporate taxes? What corporation pays corporate taxes? I thought most corporations based themselves in countries like the Netherlands that have low corporate tax rates and just keep their moneys there until tax holidays.
Loopholes, they're the rule now.
 
billyiddo said:
there's a difference between being a good person and being a sap
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Exactly.

If being a 'good person' is having a sense of right and wrong, then it should be perfectly easy to say no or walk away when someone is taking advantage.

'Making it' is more about confidence in where you are in life, not looking at others envying what they have or get away with.
 
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